Hello. Och, aye the noo!!
Ma name is McLeod. Ah’m the new Public Relations Advisor at Gladstone Vineyard. A’ve this McLeod tartan collar (that ye cannae see). A’m a Scottish Terrier but and A’m nearly six months old. I wis born near Ngarawahia (in New Zealand, of all places) on the road tae Raglan so by rights I should be a Westie (West Highland Terrier, get it?) but am no’, am a Scottie. I wisnae actually born on the road. I was born in kennels wi’ ma brothers and sisters.
I missed them tae begin wi’ but my new uncle Baxter (he’s a boxer) has been muckle kind tae me and let’s me chew his legs. He’s no’ much o’ a conversationalist but and disnae respond to my barking. Actually, he disnae respond to much at all. He’s a lot older than me. He's so auld he's almost as auld as my Ma and Pa.
Ah’ve been made Public Relations Advisor at Gladstone Vineyard (posh eh!), I think, tae liven the place up a bit. Ah get my board and lodgings (though I huvtae share with Baxter) and a fairly decent meal of a morning (though no porridge yet). Otherwise I huvtae live off customer tips. Ah’ve plenty o’ toys – a toy reindeer frae Christmas and a squeaky duck (excellent noise). I like the two cat toys best, Freddie and Freda. One’s a tabby and the other black just like me. They’re good tae chase and I am sure next time ah’ll catch ane.
As Public Relations Advisor ah huvtae greet customers when they arrive; let them stroke and pet me (it’s nae bother); cruise the tables making sure everyone pats me again. Ah’m pretty cute. And then ah huvtae pick up odd titbits that fall on the grun’. That’s the tricky bit – getting’ the customers tae drap stuff.
Anyway, I’ll keep in touch and let you know what’s happening here at the vineyard and how life is tracking. I’ve got a lot to do to knock this place into shape but so far its been no’ sae bad. Lang may yer lum reek.
(Lord) McLeod of Gladstone